Night-time Ponderings’… is ignorance bliss?

“The truth is not always beautiful, nor beautiful words the truth.” – Laozi

I read the above quote today and my immediate reaction was to think about times when I have heard a beautiful lie, or even said one. I suddenly realised that I could not recall a single time I have told a pretty lie, nor can I remember hearing one (except perhaps the infamous ‘I love you, you’re the most important person to me’ line of bull). I then began to think about myself as a human. Generally, I do not lie. I just don’t see the point. Lies always catch up with you anyway and life is too short, why waste time leaving things unsaid, or truths untold.

The only times I lie is to spare feelings of those I love but I adopt the topic-avoider approach and the switch-conversations-rapidly-before-you-notice-I-haven’t-answered-your-question-at-all tactic. I hate to lie, so generally I just avoid it.

Even uncomfortable truths need to be heard, and me as an individual would rather hear an ugly truth than a beautiful lie, though I understand some people would rather not face reality until its breathing down their neck. 

All of which led me to my next thought. Is ignorance truly bliss? My own individual answer – No. If I was given the choice between cold hard facts and a bare ugly truth vs sweet reassurance and pretty words I’d choose option one always.

My reasoning is because once confronted with the truth, no matter how bad, you can resolve it or come to terms with it. You give yourself more options and time to let it sit on your mind and either think of away around the issue or decide to move on from it. Whereas, if you bury your head in the sand or wrap up warm in cotton wool you’ll eventually have to confront the truth and when you do, it is more of a shock, more draining in general and to be perfectly honest an absolute ordeal.

I suppose if there was a 100% guarantee you’d never ever ever find out, it is understandable and more attractive to remain blissfully unaware, but even then I would rather know. The truth is important, and if you cant have truth to base your life and decisions on, everything you live thereafter is not truly true. Its a fabrication weaved from beautiful words and pretty little lies.

Trust and truth go hand in hand; You cannot truly have one without the other. There are a million examples of this like trusting governments for instance, do you trust your government 100%? Probably not right? Why? Because they lie.

Here’s another; you find out your partner has lied to you. Maybe not a massive lie, but a succession of pretty little lies i.e. gave you a false name in the beginning, or lied about where they are from, the friend they met up with a few months ago was an ex-partner but they ended on good terms, they tell you they’re in work busy but actually are on break, they tell you that their mum is calling but it’s actually a friend. If you found out they lied about any or all of these things would you still trust them? Probably not right? How can you trust someone who is incapable of honesty. The truth is dishonesty leads to mistrust because if you feel the need to lie you aren’t serious or genuine about what you say or do. That’s my opinion anyhow…

I dunno, I guess the words resonated in my mind and fed my soul. Please feel free to comment I would love to hear any and all opinions 🙂 Where ever you are, hope your day/night is beautiful

As Always

Allie xoxo

Artsy

Hello beautiful people, just fancied sharing a beautiful piece of amateur art with you today – I found it on Facebook but cannot locate an artist name which is a shame I’d love to credit them. Oh well, enjoy!

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As always,
Allie xoxo

Seventy percent of the word Diet is DIE…

So many girls these days are on diet crazes. I look at the majority of these young women and literally see skin and bone and think WHY!? If you loose any more weight you’ll simply disappear into thin air!!

I admit, I am 4ft11″ and currently weigh just under 8 stone and have previously worried about my weight thinking I will look like a little umpa lumpa if I exceed 8 stone, so like many others I’ve fallen into the diet trap. But unlike most young girls who do, I did my homework.

GIRLS
You can STILL enjoy your favourite foods, you do not need to starve yourself and cut chocolate out of your lives entirely that’s a fucking myth! All you have to do is indulge in a balanced diet and exercise!

Now exercise does NOT mean murdering yourself at the gym a good lengthy walk at a moderate pace STILL burns calories and you won’t be sore all over the next day.

The truth is as long as you’re moving your ass and not shovelling fast food down your throat at every mealtime opportunity you won’t gain weight you’ll maintain it. Which is much healthier than massive weight fluctuations, I’m sure you’ll agree.

Now even though I’ve calculated my BMI as ok and my Body fat percentage as a modest 23% I have a little podge on the tummy region, nothing awful just there, and I admit the muffin top tummy look isn’t a good one so here’s my advice to getting your tummy flat without starving yourself.

1. Eat well
That means hitting all the food groups including carbs just not abusing them. Substituting fruit, nuts and granola yogurts for candies helps you cut your junk intake, if you really don’t know download a fitness app to count calorie intake or consult a dietician.

2. Exercise
It doesn’t matter how well you eat if you’re vegetating on a sofa you kinda have to get your ass up. This as I said earlier doesn’t mean killing yourself on a treadmill walking a longer route home or not taking short bus journeys or simply taking the stairs in buildings over the lift (elevator if you’re American) can really help burn calories.

3. Tone
I do sit ups during the advert break on tv, not excessively, and not even every ad break but I do at least 30 a day to help tone the tummy

4. Enjoy the result
Obviously this will not happen in a day you have to keep this up and to be honest how long it takes depends on your own body.

Night-time ponderings

A few weeks back, Em, my closest female friend asked me to be her Maid of Honour for her wedding next spring — of course I was absolutely delighted and honoured she had asked me at all. As the weeks have slowly ticked onward and I have been trawling haphazardly through various wedding blog’s I realised I actually don’t know much about weddings. There’s actually loads of extra stuff the romance novelists and Hollywood directors leave out! There’s like a gazillion events like dinners and parties (pre-wedding) that I’m at a loss of what happens when etc. 

The whole confusion got me to thinking when I had imagined my own big day I had always focused on the ceremony itself. I had not really given much thought to the other stuff… apart from the hen party and the honeymoon and the other aesthetic features I wanted, I then determined this was probably the soul reason for my own ignorance on the topic. Oh well.

Em and Matt (her fiancé) are so good for each other, and compliment each other perfectly. I had always known that the couple were built to last, when Matt had told me his plans to propose my first immediate thought, I admit, was “but you guys are SO young” Em and I are 20 and Matt is a 21 but then I kinda realised that I couldn’t imagine either of them with another person, and as they’ve been in a relationship for so long already live together it is the logical next step on the commitment ladder. Plus I always respected them both for doing it properly the old fashioned way – marriage then babies. I don’t know about you, reader, but I find I know many many young single mothers now many of whom are my own age, and some of them having multiple candidates for the childs’ biological father, which is kinda sad really.

I’ve kinda scratched out a little timeline of when I would roughly like to settle down and begin a family and I have a target to do so in a number of years. Ideally, as a 20 year old I think the perfect time to settle down and marry is about 25 years old and adding children to our family? A minimum of a year after tying the knot. I have chosen those numbers for my own personal reasons, I finish Uni in two years and want to build my career before becoming a wife and mother as I know that I would have to take time out of the field when starting a family. I also believe that a couple should be engaged a year before tying the knot and should live together before that. I believe its a gradual process —  you need to make sure you can stand each other before getting babies involved!

Thinking about it, am I asking too much? Am I too particular? Is it really right to plan that meticulously? I’m not sure. Though for all my plans and ponderings the one really crucial question is; Am I a hypocrite, if my BF proposed out of the timeline or whilst we were still young would I accept? the answer is simply yeah, to both points.

It’s amazing when you find that person who completes you and makes you feel both whole and secure. He is the yang to my ying. And I know no matter what order I’ve compartmentalised my family life If he asked in a day a year or 4 years the answer would be the same. And nothing else matters.

 

As Always 

Allie xoxo