Life skills life lacks

Hello friends, this is a rant so if you don’t wanna read and get involved I’m not going to be offended at all 🙂

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This picture perfectly sums up the story I wish to share with you. Today,
A very close friend phoned me out of the blue for a catch up chat – I was absolutely thrilled I hadn’t spoken to her in weeks (we kept missing each other the perks of busy life) so needless to say we had TONNES to catch up on. I began to explain to her about my granddad’s stroke which happened in January (during exam week no less) and told her how much he has improved from then. This is when our happy chat went downhill she made this sort of disbelieving snort and then said “well he is old Allie, this is the beginning of the end now so you should start saving up for his funeral and get him to take out a life insurance” – like WHAT?!?!

Naturally I did a mini double take and said “I cannot even believe I heard those words, surely you can’t mean that”. “Of course I do,” she says “I mean he’s on deaths door you might as well profit from it”. Needless to say I was fucking stunned. This is a girl I’ve known for 6 years and I never knew she was capable of such tactlessness.

I mean, I’m not one to avoid the truth, I know my gramps is getting on a bit but this is actually the first real medical problem he has had other than calcium on the elbow and the guy is 81 years old – I think he’s doing well! One thing is saying “that’s not good Allie, tell him to get a life cover with critical illness it might be a comfort to him knowing he’s protected” and an entirely different thing is “ensure you cash in on him dying Allie, you might as well.”

I told her that was a very cold thing to say to which her only response was “well if it was my gramps I’d at least make sure he had insurance to pay the fucking funeral you don’t wanna end up having to pay for that shit it’s expensive.” I couldn’t believe it, so I asked her “where were you when they were giving out manners and common courtesies? I guess you over slept” she laughed it off as best she could but the convo was stilted and forced after that so the call ended as suddenly as it began.

Am I just over reacting? I don’t believe I am, I thought that was a completely tactless way to say that. Tact is a life skill! Doesn’t everyone understand how to be thoughtful at all!?!

I have lost some respect for her since though, I did not like that at all. I guess it shows you don’t always know someone… Ah well

As always
Allie xoxo

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Night-time Ponderings’… is ignorance bliss?

“The truth is not always beautiful, nor beautiful words the truth.” – Laozi

I read the above quote today and my immediate reaction was to think about times when I have heard a beautiful lie, or even said one. I suddenly realised that I could not recall a single time I have told a pretty lie, nor can I remember hearing one (except perhaps the infamous ‘I love you, you’re the most important person to me’ line of bull). I then began to think about myself as a human. Generally, I do not lie. I just don’t see the point. Lies always catch up with you anyway and life is too short, why waste time leaving things unsaid, or truths untold.

The only times I lie is to spare feelings of those I love but I adopt the topic-avoider approach and the switch-conversations-rapidly-before-you-notice-I-haven’t-answered-your-question-at-all tactic. I hate to lie, so generally I just avoid it.

Even uncomfortable truths need to be heard, and me as an individual would rather hear an ugly truth than a beautiful lie, though I understand some people would rather not face reality until its breathing down their neck. 

All of which led me to my next thought. Is ignorance truly bliss? My own individual answer – No. If I was given the choice between cold hard facts and a bare ugly truth vs sweet reassurance and pretty words I’d choose option one always.

My reasoning is because once confronted with the truth, no matter how bad, you can resolve it or come to terms with it. You give yourself more options and time to let it sit on your mind and either think of away around the issue or decide to move on from it. Whereas, if you bury your head in the sand or wrap up warm in cotton wool you’ll eventually have to confront the truth and when you do, it is more of a shock, more draining in general and to be perfectly honest an absolute ordeal.

I suppose if there was a 100% guarantee you’d never ever ever find out, it is understandable and more attractive to remain blissfully unaware, but even then I would rather know. The truth is important, and if you cant have truth to base your life and decisions on, everything you live thereafter is not truly true. Its a fabrication weaved from beautiful words and pretty little lies.

Trust and truth go hand in hand; You cannot truly have one without the other. There are a million examples of this like trusting governments for instance, do you trust your government 100%? Probably not right? Why? Because they lie.

Here’s another; you find out your partner has lied to you. Maybe not a massive lie, but a succession of pretty little lies i.e. gave you a false name in the beginning, or lied about where they are from, the friend they met up with a few months ago was an ex-partner but they ended on good terms, they tell you they’re in work busy but actually are on break, they tell you that their mum is calling but it’s actually a friend. If you found out they lied about any or all of these things would you still trust them? Probably not right? How can you trust someone who is incapable of honesty. The truth is dishonesty leads to mistrust because if you feel the need to lie you aren’t serious or genuine about what you say or do. That’s my opinion anyhow…

I dunno, I guess the words resonated in my mind and fed my soul. Please feel free to comment I would love to hear any and all opinions 🙂 Where ever you are, hope your day/night is beautiful

As Always

Allie xoxo

Artsy

Hello beautiful people, just fancied sharing a beautiful piece of amateur art with you today – I found it on Facebook but cannot locate an artist name which is a shame I’d love to credit them. Oh well, enjoy!

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As always,
Allie xoxo